Monday, October 22, 2012

Split Frame

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I try to capture a picture with G everyday, but the ones taken on Monday mornings are the most important to me. Those are the mornings when the weekly routine feels so heavy, when I spend half of my commute talking to an empty carseat before realizing he's already been dropped-off at daycare, the days I spend most of my time with my cell phone in my lap, scrolling through photos and looking for a pick-me-up. I try not to dwell on it or wallow in some bratty entitlement issue that makes me sour about having to do what the rest of the world does everyday - go to work to support their families. But most of the time, I feel that even if I had fifty hours in a day to spend with my son, it still wouldn't be enough. I'm thankful that we have stable careers that provide food and shelter and security for him, things he'll hopefully never have to question.

It's still tough some days.

On those tough days I rely a lot on the blurry (and often, unfortunately, rushed) photos I snap with my cell phone right before I scoot out the door. Today is one of those days. Cell phone in lap or back pocket, I'm feeling thankful to be where I am while also feeling thankful that there's somewhere else I'd rather be. I suppose that while it's not a physical possibility, my heart can be in two places at once.


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